Vancouver, September 20th, 2012: Executive Search Dating has been voted Vancouver’s “Best Dating Service” for the second year in a row in the 17th annual Georgia Straight “Best Of Vancouver” reader’s choice awards, it was announced today.
This coveted award is chosen annually by readers of The Georgia Straight, Canada’s largest urban weekly with over 800,000 readers in Vancouver.
“We are so excited to have won the ‘Best Dating Service’ award for the second straight year!” says Paddi Rice, President and Founder of Executive Search Dating. “Thanks to everyone who voted for us and, in particular, I’d like to thank our incredible clients and staff who have allowed us to help Vancouver singles find love for over 8 years now!”
Contrary to popular opinion, being seen as ‘sexy’ or ‘attractive’ by your date partner often comes from the inside out and not the other way around.
Here are some proven tips on how you can attract your date in ways that will last:
- Making an effort: taking some time to dress nicely for your date is a simple but powerful way to make a good first impression on your date.
- Politeness works: being polite (standing up when your date arrives; waiting for your date to arrive before ordering; being kind and friendly to the wait staff; etc.) is a sure-fire attention getter. Creating an early impression that you are a kind and friendly person will often cause your date to give you a second look, even when they are not immediately attracted to you.
- Be relationship potential: tight fitting clothes or heavy cologne might work wonders in a bar, but whats far more important on a date is to give your date the impression that you are ‘relationship potential’. Avoid talking about your wild social life, or last weekend’s late party night… aim instead to talk about things that interest you (and them): travel, friends, culture, music, food, etc. Save your party hat for the party.
- Its not about you, its about them: making your date feel comfortable, relaxed and important is one of the sexiest things you can do on a date. Focus more on your date’s happiness and you’ll find that its reciprocated soon enough.
- Laughter – the great aphrodisiac: not everyone is blessed with a natural sense of humour, and cheesy or off-color jokes are to be avoided, but laughter is the way to someones heart. Make an effort to inject some humour on your date, and you’ll soon find yourself making plans for a second date and beyond.
First dates may be more exciting, but second dates are more important. Here’s why: people are rarely the truest version of themselves on a first date; so you often you get a better sense of true chemistry on a second (or third) date with someone.
So how and when do you decide whether you want to see someone a second time and, if so, what’s the best way to get to a second date? Here’s how:
- Avoid snap decisions: in spite of what you’ve heard, you’ll likely not know if someones right for you in the first 30 seconds, or even on a first date. Taking the time to really get to know someone beyond a first date is an important part of successful ‘positive dating’.
- Physical chemistry vs. true chemistry: just because you find someone attractive or unattractive on a first meeting, doesn’t mean you’ll feel the same way once you get to know them better. Yes, you do want to have at least a little chemistry with someone on a first date, but true chemistry builds and grows over time as you get to know someone better.
- Make a second date your default position: unless you are ABSOLUTELY sure that you have zero connection with someone on a first date, always plan to see someone a second time. Keep it casual, a coffee date or a walk along the seawall. Most people are more relaxed on a second date so you’ll get a much better sense of who they are and whether you feel real ‘chemistry’. Plus, just because there’s no chemistry or ‘relationship potential’ doesn’t mean the person can’t become a friend, or introduce you to their friend who’s perfect for you!
- Good things come to those who ask: if you are interested in seeing the person a second time, don’t feel like you have to wait a few days to ask… the best time to ask for a second date, in fact, is when you are on your first date. And yes, its okay for either the man or the woman to ask… waiting for the other person to call you after your date is one of the most unpleasant parts of dating. Being proactive beats waiting by your phone any day.
In a perfect world, people tell you exactly what they think of you. But in the real world of dating, sometimes actions (or non-actions) speak louder than words.
Here are some “unspoken signs” that your date has already formed an opinion about you, and what you can do to fix it:
- Sign #1 – Silence is (not) golden: you may feel like your date is going well, but if your date partner is not talking at all its usually a bad sign.
- The Fix: ideally, you want to listen as much as you speak on a date. If you find yourself doing all the talking, ask your date some fun and easy questions (ie. ‘what was the most fun thing you did over the summer’; ‘what’s your favorite place to travel to and why?’; etc.), then actively listen to their response… being attentive and interested is an alluring quality, and can help relax your date partner.
- Sign #2 – Send in the frowns: if your date looks like he/she is not having a good time, its best to assume they aren’t. Not everyone can or should be smiling the whole date, but frowns or blank/bored stares from your date are a sign that they aren’t enjoying themselves.
- The Fix: preparation is at the heart of good conversation; don’t simply rely on your natural charm, think of a few fun and interesting topics and/or stories to talk about with your date. Focusing more on your date than on yourself is a proven dating success factor.
- Sign #3 – Don’t call me, I’ll call you: if your date doesn’t respond to your post date follow ups, its either one of two things – they are very busy or they aren’t interested in seeing you again.
- The Fix: persistence can be a positive quality, but don’t go overboard. If you have sent your date a follow up note or call and they haven’t responded, a second call or email expressing your interest in seeing them again is appropriate. If they still don’t respond its likely a sign they’re not interested, which is a normal and natural part of the dating process. Stay positive and move along to another match.