Who wants to date forever? Answer: virtually no-one.
Dating can and should be fun. And its an essential part of finding your special someone, and fine tuning what you’re really looking for in someone. But the central purpose of dating is to meet that one person you truly connect with.
If you’re dating with the sole purpose of going on more and more dates, you’ll find dating will become less fun, and much less effective.
But how do you know when you’ve met ‘the one’, and can stop dating and focus on them alone? Here are the signs:
- Fascination street: do you find someone so intriguing that you’re already making a list of things to talk about when you see them next? If so, prioritize them above others.
- Off your chest: if you’re excited to tell someone about your day/week/inner thoughts and fears, its a sign that they’re not ‘just another date’.
- Missing person: do you find yourself thinking about someone even when you’re on a date with someone else? Note to self – stop dating and call that person. Fast.
- Blandness: if you’re finding that all the people you’re meeting seem the same, no matter how great they appear on the outside, it’s a sign that you’re looking for a deeper connection beyond just looks and initial chemistry.
- Talk for hours: the desire and ability to have long, interesting conversations with someone about a wide variety of topics, even after seeing each other a number of times, is a great sign. Whereas initial physical chemistry becomes less important as time goes on, your ability to connect with someone at a deeper level becomes more important.
- Make it stop: if you’re having to fight the urge to cancel dates last minute because you can’t bear the thought of another first date, then stop dating. If there’s someone you’ve connected with, great. If not, you should still take a break.
- When in doubt: if after all of the above, you’re still not sure if someone is ‘the one’, it’s worthwhile putting a temporary pause on dating new people and see that one person a few more times. Consider it a wise investment in your future happiness.
They say modern technology is supposed to make your life easier and more ‘hassle free’, but is that true in dating? Many Vancouver singles will tell you their answer is ‘No!’.
Although online dating and dating apps have become more popular, and there are more online profiles for you to review, it’s also become more time consuming and, in some cases, more frustrating.
The secret to your dating success is to have a strategy. Here’s 10 tips on how you can get one, fast!:
- Focus: being proactive in dating is good, but trying so many dating options at the same time that you get overwhelmed is not. Rome was not built in day, nor should your dating life be.
- Have a life: no matter how keen you are to meet your special someone, don’t just focus exclusively on dating. Spending quality time with friends and family can be a necessary counter-weight to your busy single life.
- Take a break: if dating is beginning to feel like a job, take a few weeks off from dating. You’ll get better dating results when you’re feeling more relaxed, so consider it a sound investment.
- Laughter is the best medicine: the key to successful dating is a positive attitude. If you’re not feeling it, look at your dating life as though it were a popular reality TV show. The ability to laugh at oneself and ones ‘so-called single life’ is an attractive and liberating quality.
- More than looks: yes, chemistry is an important element in dating but by focusing only on looks you’ll likely miss out on some great catches; possibly even ‘the one’.
- Nothing is free: if you are online dating, consider using one of the paid online dating services vs. the free online dating sites. The cost factor will serve to screen out some of those who aren’t really ‘invested’ in dating or serious about it.
- Don’t be fooled: if you’re online dating, remember that not all photos posted are current or accurate so basing your decisions on photos alone is not the best bet. Also, those who have incredible photos posted (accurate or otherwise) are likely overwhelmed with emails. On the other hand, that other profile which sounds more intriguing but with an average photo, might in fact be a better match for you.
- Go old school: put your computer and smartphone down and get outside, or hit a new neighborhood with some friends for a few drinks. You’ll be surprised how well an old fashioned ‘hi, how are you?’ works in today’s modern world, particularly in Vancouver.
- Hire a Pro: if you’re a busy single, or looking to meet compatible, relationship-minded matches, hiring a personalized matchmaking service like Executive Search Dating makes sense. Call us today at 604-462-8743 (604-Go-Cupid) and we’ll do the rest.
- Quality vs. quantity: the core of whichever dating strategy you choose should be LESS dates but MORE quality matches. If you’re finding this hard to do, refer to point #9 above!
When dating begins to feel like a (lousy) job, stop dating. Here’s why: if you’re not enjoying dating or feeling ‘dating burnout’, you may be on a date with your perfect match and you wouldn’t know it. Successful dating relies, more than anything else, on your own attitude and dating approach.
So how do you stop the endless cycle of bad dates, and start moving towards a lasting relationship? Well, there’s a simple method, and here it is:
- Quality is as quality does: if you’re looking to connect with high quality, relationship-minded singles start first with adjusting your dating mindset accordingly. Worry less about what your date can do to entertain you, and more about what you can do to ensure they enjoy themselves.
- Don’t boil the ocean: no matter how impatient you may be to meet your special someone, like all good things in life it can take time. Going on 5 dates a week will not lead you to anything more than dating burnout. Aim for less dates, with more time between dates so you have the chance to see someone a second or third time before meeting someone else.
- Forget the past, don’t sweat the future: good advice for dating and for life – the only thing you can control is the here and now. Focus on the date in front of you, be interested and interesting, and the future will sort itself out eventually.
- The virtuous cycle of dating: focus on quality, compatible matches, which leads to a successful date, which makes you feel more positive and self-confident, which greatly increases your chances of dating success, which will lead you to a lasting relationship.
In the world of Vancouver dating, there is one question more intriguing than virtually any other: what do Vancouver men really want?
In fact, unlocking this riddle just may be the key to solving Vancouver’s ‘dating dilemma’ – and the answer may surprise you:
- Be together: no-one’s perfect, and men know that as much as anyone. But a woman who is in charge of her life and issues, and projects a positive attitude on life and love is a quality that’s particularly attractive to relationship-minded men.
- Be genuine: for some reason, Vancouver has the reputation as a city built on pretense. However, for men looking to find their special someone, nothing could be farther from the truth. Men (and women too) are attracted to someone who despite their flaws is generally open, down-to-earth and happy with who they are.
- Be interested: relationship minded men truly want to feel that a woman is having an enjoyable time on their date. When a woman seems distracted, aloof or simply not interested on a date, it can be a real turn off. Instead of increasing a man’s interest in the woman, it can lead to a short, boring and unsuccessful dating experience. Always remember, even if that particular man is not for you, he may know someone who is – so making a good impression is always the best policy.
- Be relationship potential: a woman who is fun and can have a good time in social settings is generally a positive for most men. But if you’re a woman looking for relationship-minded men, avoid partying and drinking to excess in a dating situation. Although that may be an attractive quality for someone just looking for a good time; it’s not necessarily what a man is looking for in a long term relationship partner.
Vancouver just may be the dating myth capital of the world. But here’s the problem: how do you separate ‘dating myth’ from ‘dating reality’?
Here’s why it’s important: separating dating myths from facts is the first step towards IMPROVING your dating life, and finding your special someone. Here are the top 3 Vancouver dating myths, and the truth behind the myths!